Teacher of the Year

I used to work with a woman who bore a striking resemblence to Kevin Bacon. This woman was consumed with shameless self promotion. Honestly, she couldn't hold a simple conversation without commenting about how good she was at something, anything.

A spent one abbreviated school year as her supervisor. If I said she was a pain in the ass it would be an understatement. Mrs. Bacon (no relation to the actor) and I had a very tenuous relationship. It was tenuous because she hated me and had no problem fabricating any story she liked to try to defame and discredit me as a professional. I'll have many more posts about Mrs. Bacon in the future.

Mrs. Bacon thought she was a very smooth operator. I truly think she believed her own bullshit. One fateful day she made an appointment to meet with me in my office.
When the time came to meet she didn't show up. My office was literally ten feet from her classroom. When she didn't show up I didn't care I had plenty to do anyway. After about ten minutes I heard her door shut. She didn't come to my office, instead she paraded around the hallway apparently talking to a parent. After a few moments she returned to her room and I continued working on what ever I was working on.

A few minutes passed by again. Again she was in the hallway speaking loudly on her cordless phone. I could clearly hear her say, "You know me...there isn't anything I wouldn't do for one of my students."

She returned to her room again. I went back to work. A few more minutes passed by and she was back in the hallway talking loudly. "I know it's after my contracted hours but I just wanted to touch base."

This time I took the bait. I got up from my desk and looked out in the hallway. Mrs. bacon was looking directly at more door way. When I appeared she jumped back and acted as if she was totaly startled by my presence. She raised her hand in the air to signal that I should remain quiet while she finished her conversation. She reported to the invisible person on the other end of the line that her supervisor was there to meet with her. She hit the bottom on the ancient looking cordless phone to end the phone call.

Less than a second or two later I could clearly hear a dial tone. Mrs. bacon was not on the phone with anyone. It took her less than a second she realized what had just happened and she pushed the botton again to hang up. With out missing a beat she stated, "I had no idea you were in your office. Do you have time to meet now?"
"Sure."
"If you don't mind I prefer to meet in my classroom."
"Sure"
The two of us went in to her classroom. Mrs. Bacon made sure to scan the hallway. Why? I don't know. It seemed very odd, but then again so did pretending to be on the phone with a parent.

Mrs. Bacon started in right away. "You know I have a lot of special programming that I do in addition to the curriculum that I teach that I have personally modified to meet the needs of all of my students." She would over emphasize the words "I" and "my" After one sentence her face was red, her speach was rapid, and the look on her face was priceless. She continued on. "I don't need the awards and accolades...look around this room! LOOK AT THE BLING!"

I sat there listening thinking to myself...look at the bling? This woman was nuts.

She continued appearing to be on the verge of tears.

"You know where I'm coming from. You work your ass off and where's the pay off? Where's the recognition? People see test scores it doesn't matter how many awards you win."

Where the F was this lady going with this conversation? She looked like she was going to cry and I wanted to leave the room. But she pressed on.

"Five time teacher of year! But that won't be printed in the paper next to the fucking PSSA scores!"

Whoa! I wanted to laugh but I sat there. I hated this woman. She was a bad teacher and a rotten individual. She was a liar and a gossipmonger.

She appeared to gain her composure in a matter of seconds. Again very odd! Then she said, "To be recognized for the awards I was just referencing you need to be nominated by an administrator. I don't know if thats something you'd be interested in."

So it became very clear. This asshole wanted me to nominate her.

She continued. "If it is something you're interested in I have...right over here...a packet with all of the information."

She walked over to her desk picked up a folder with my name on it and proceeded to hand it to me with a big stupid smile on her face.

The piece of shit wanted me to fill out some bullshit packet and include a written narrative in support of her for teacher of the year. Unfortunatley for Mrs. Bacon my opinion of her was not nearly as high as her opinion of herself.

Mrs. Bacon was a worthless individual. Her kids hate her. Her husband hates her but is an asshole too. ANd I hated her...still do! Only days before this meeting Mrs. Bacon had approached me and requested that I remove another teacher from there position and replace that teacher with her husband. During that conversation Mrs. Bacon made several nasty statements about a woman I'll call Ms. Quasimoto. Mrs. Bacon wanted me to remove Ms. Quasimoto from her spot because she was going through a divorce, she might have cancer, she dressed "too common", and she was less suited to do the job than Mrs. Bacon's husband. All great reasons I'm sure to demote someone.

Anyway, Mrs. Bacon was standing there infront of me smiling waiting for my response. I shit you not when I say that the look on her face went from angel to demon in a split second when she heard me say...

"I would be very interested in that, thankyou. Ms. Quasimoto has done an outstanding job...she deserves to be recognized and so do the kids in her program."

Holy shit! I thought she was going to hit me! All she said was "Oh." At first I was so happy to have shit in her kitchen sink, but then the woman looked so scorned that I was nervous. The next day I was still a little shook and...I even went into her classroom to kiss her ass a little and tell her what a great teacher I thought she was. I wanted to throw up on myslef after, but that's how evil she looked when I told her I'd do it for Quasi and not her!